WTF IS BODY INTELLIGENCE

“When you are disconnected from the body, you are disconnected from the most tangible reality of your being” -Philip Shepherd, Radical Wholeness.

The truth is, the world of thought and evaluation is a tiny fraction of the knowledge that is available to you. This essay is a gateway into not only understanding the paradigm shift of Body Intelligence, but also to serve as a beginning roadmap and lighthouse for how to embrace this profound shift into your daily life.

Written by Lily Shepard, 2024

Body Intelligence connects you to your hard-wired, immediate responses to the world as well as your learned patterns and conditioned responses so that you can begin to make your highest choices. The ones that lead you to bigger opportunities, more satisfying relationships and more confidence in your daily walk.

Because society values power and progress, your body has taken the role of subordinate, working beneath your mind. You think of your cognitive function as the thing that moves you forward while your body is merely something to be pushed, pulled and molded to your liking.

Your body is simply the package. Continually trying to improve its appearance, working hard to make it attractive and desirable by any means necessary. (hello, $528.6 Billion dollar & $90 Billion dollar Beauty and Diet industries!)

You don’t often consider it, unless it screams at you in the form of pain, exhaustion, anxiety, injury or illness.

You’re taught to revel in the status of being the “go-to” person. The busy, reliable, loyal, steadfast, recognized, validated successful woman who does it all and looks good doing it. All the while secretly feeling burnt out, and often, sexually stagnant.

Burnt and dry – hardly a combo to aspire to, wouldn’t you agree?

What nobody tells you is that sacrificing your body’s intelligence in pursuit of career achievement and social acceptance is a fast track to a poor quality of life. Especially for women, who often take on the lion's share of uncompensated domestic and emotional labor while navigating a career. Let’s not forget women have a propensity for people pleasing, perfectionism and imposter syndrome.

And truthfully, the overwhelming amount of content swirling around the internet about embodiment, connecting to the Feminine, and best self care practices is superficial, impractical and non-inclusive. Here’s why 👇🏾

1️⃣ The images associated with these concepts exclude marginalized people. Google feminine embodiment and you will scroll very far before coming across anyone other than a thin, heterosexual, able bodied white woman. Most of the discussions happening online around embodiment are not led by people of the *global majority and seeing as though many of the practices employed in this work are indigenous practices, that doesn't sit well with me.

2️⃣ The wellness industry has an exploitative business model that focuses on novel products and guru-like leadership with no real attention to intrinsic nourishment. Many leaders in the space aim to make followers, clients and students beholden to them rather than truly empowering them.

3️⃣ To that end, much of what is taught around harnessing the power of the body gives you no practical tools that you can apply off of your peloton bike, outside of the yoga studio, without a green juice, in the absence of singing bowls etc. What does this work look like when you’re in a business negotiation? When you walk through the door after a long day at work to chaos at home? In your bedroom? When you need to hire a new employee? When you need to set a boundary with a friend? When you want to attract a new partner?

*The term global majority is a collective term for people of Indigenous, African, Asian or Latin American descent who make up around 85% of the population.

“The modern individual is committed to being successful, not to being a person. He belongs rightly to the ‘action generation’ whose motto is to ‘do more but feel less” - Eric Fromm, Social Psychologist/Philosopher

Understanding Body Intelligence is the first step on a pathway that empowers you and other women (all humans really) to develop a more confident presence, become resilient, self-aware and ultimately, to trust and receive wisdom from their bodies. Your body weighs in on your decisions and plays a huge role in how you broadcast your freedom, power and femininity to the world.

The Biological Basis of Body Intelligence

It's commonly believed that you can change your behavior through reasoning or thinking. However, biologically, this is inaccurate.

The body is the most direct and fastest route to change. Most of your behavior operates on autopilot, outside of your consciousness. Your learned habits and instincts drive 95-99% of our actions. You often think you are choosing how to behave, but your rational mind plays a limited role in producing behavior. The body plays a far greater role than previously thought in your perception and actions.

For instance, consider a businesswoman in a high-stakes negotiation. She might rationally understand the need to remain calm and collected. However, if her body is tense and her heart is racing, her ability to project confidence and make clear decisions is compromised. By developing Body Intelligence, she can tune into these physical cues, regulate her stress response, and enhance her performance.

Fifteen years ago, I realized that despite being a dancer my whole life, I had no idea how to do these things.

My Aha Moment

I was alone on stage with red lights illuminating my body and hundreds of eyes on me. I slowly walked around the pole, like a regal huntress selecting my prey. I went through the motions, moving in ways intended to look sexy to the audience but felt robotic and calculated to me.

As I took to the stage at the world’s biggest strip club in Las Vegas, it hit me -- I had absolutely no connection to how my body was moving.

Here I was doing the most sexy, sensual job you could think of. Making stacks of money nightly —and I didn't realize how disconnected from my body I really was. My mind was calculating how much more money I needed to make before I could leave, how much sleep I would get before it was time to take my daughter to school, what snacks I could eat that wouldn’t make me feel bloated.

Not only was my mind not present, but my body seemed to be angry at me. I remember being onstage and wanting to move differently but being afraid that veering from the formula would mess up my money.

I had forgotten how to move in ways that made me feel good. On the surface, I had all of the things - a husband, a beautiful child, a lovely home and plenty of disposable income. But there was little fulfillment or creativity. I remember dancing on stage that night, swaying my hips as money rained down on me and thinking...there has to be more. Just as I was coming to this realization, the rug was pulled from under me.

Not even two full days after this moment of truth onstage at the club, I suffered public humiliation in my marriage when I found out my husband had been having an affair for quite some time, and I was the last to know.

As it unraveled, I became aware of multiple lies and deception that had taken place over the course of our five-year marriage. This resulted in divorce and threw me into single motherhood. Early on in my relationship to my ex-husband, I was confronted with several red flags that I chose to ignore because I had already drawn my conclusions in my mind.

I recognized certain behaviors as red flags at the time. I felt that things were not right but I simply didn’t trust my inner knowing enough to move on what I felt.

I was emotionally distraught, financially unstable, and disappointed in myself. I had to file for bankruptcy and work at the club six days a week into the wee hours of the morning to stay afloat. I popped Adderall and drank Red Bull to make it through the late nights. I felt exhausted, empty, and defeated.

My life was a series of putting out fires, showing up to court dates, and trying my best to be an attentive mother. My confidence took a major hit as the life I thought I had crumbled in front of my face.

I knew I needed to regain my confidence and I desperately wanted to feel good. I needed an anchor. Something to keep me from losing myself completely. I had the strong feeling that if I continued down the path I was on, sooner or later I would no longer recognize myself.

I started searching for inspirational quotes online, saying affirmations and joining support groups, but none of it was working. One day I was standing in front of my mirror repeating some bullshit affirmation that I didn’t believe and a small voice inside of me, clear as day, said, “Move. You can trust me.”

After 25+ years studying dance on a professional level, then working for several years as an exotic dancer and spending plenty of time “acting sexy,” I realized that I had no movement practice of my own—something that wasn't performative or for the male gaze, but simply just for me to connect with and listen to my body.

Guided by that small voice, I put a playlist on shuffle and moved my body for almost an hour straight. I twerked, twirled, rolled on the floor, cried, did African dance, stretched, jumped and breathed deeply in silence.

That feeling of more that I craved, even before my world started to crumble, was right there.

I had been overwhelmed by the drive to succeed on my own. I was buried beneath the pressure to increase my income, be a perfect mother, get out of crisis mode and rebuild my life. Within that movement was everything I had been looking for. There was creativity, expression, flow, surrender, and attunement. There was a heightened intelligence.

I knew it would be a process to relearn how to trust my body and feel confident and powerful again, but I understood at that moment that I had just taken the first step.

So after all this talking, I’m sure you are thinking ‘Okay Lily, what does this look like practically, in my day to day life?’

Enter the GEPAP framework. (Pronounced geepap rhymes with CPAP, as in the sleep apnea machine) GEPAP is my framework to conceptualize Body Intelligence that will literally change your life. It has most certainly revolutionized mine.

The GEPAP Framework

To cultivate Body Intelligence, you can utilize the GEPAP framework, which stands for Grounding, Expression, Presence, Attunement, and Pleasure. Each component offers a pathway to deeper self-awareness and connection with your body that will upgrade the way you lead.

Grounding. This is the foundation of Body Intelligence. Centering practices such as meditation, breathwork, tapping and body scanning help you ground yourself and strengthen your present time awareness. These practices calm the mind, reduce stress and create a state of balance and clarity.

Expression. Your body is a powerful tool for expression and unfortunately many women have either never been encouraged to, or have forgotten how to express themselves fully. They put their self-expression through the filters of their own projections and what they think people are thinking of them, essentially becoming a muted version of who they truly are,choosing invisibility over authentic self expression.

Presence. A huge part of Body Intelligence is cultivating your unique presence and learning how to amplify it. Whether you know it or not, you have a certain brand of charisma.

Identifying it and working with it instead of latching on to the persona of who you believe you have to be to lead effectively, enhances your ability to connect with others and respond authentically. Developing confidence in your body language, your walk, your posture and your gestures, helps to increase your personal presence .

Attunement. Attunement is about being aware of and responding to another person’s emotional needs. The ability to get out of your head and tap in to another person’s emotional and energetic state through an open and relaxed nervous system.

Pleasure. Embracing pleasure is an often-overlooked aspect of Body Intelligence. This involves engaging in activities that bring joy and satisfaction, and savoring positive experiences.

The effects of a lack of pleasure in your life have a way of sneaking up on you because the effects often don’t feel altogether like unhappiness. It’s more like a slight gnawing that you feel growing over time. Contrary to what religion, patriarchy and hustle culture tell us, pleasure is not indulgent; it's a necessary component of a balanced life.

So Can’t I Just Go To A Yoga Retreat?

Sure. I mean, who doesn’t love downward dog against an Instagram-able backdrop, prepared vegan meals and bonding with other women who are “doing the work”?

But here’s the thing….real transformation is the result of cumulative action. The wellness industry would like us to believe that we can and should remain on autopilot in the bulk of our daily lives, and in turn, sink money into the industry to “reconnect with ourselves”. Rinse and repeat.

This is no shade to retreats. I love them and they can provide a starting point for people looking to change their lives. However, developing Body Intelligence is less about what you do and more about how you live. It’s Yoga, off the mat. It’s full expression in and out of the workspace. It’s active listening with your family. It’s confidence in male dominated spaces. It’s deeper intimacy. It’s nervous system regulation. It’s reverence for self. It is how you show up.

The Broader Impact of Body Intelligence

Beyond personal well-being, Body Intelligence has the potential to create broader social change.

In a society where the dominant narratives are often shaped by a privileged minority, embracing Body Intelligence can help dismantle oppressive systems and foster a more inclusive and compassionate world.

Body Intelligence promotes a new kind of leadership— one that is empathetic, authentic, and grounded. Embodied leaders inspire commitment and hold space for the compassionate and creative humanity of their teams.

They recognize the value of diverse perspectives and create environments where everyone can thrive. There is more cooperation and less coercion.

Cultivating Body Intelligence, opens you to become more aware of the ways in which societal structures impact your life.

You start to think about how you embody oppressive social conditions through your non-verbal interactions, and how oppression may affect your relationship with your own body. Your nonverbal communication patterns, beliefs about body norms, and feelings of connection and identification with your body are all deeply affected by your assigned membership in different social groups and the privileges associated with that membership.

You can become aware of how your familiar patterns have been shaped by the various social identities you hold and focus on how you can foster a more inclusive culture both in and out of the workplace.

Embracing Body Intelligence can shift cultural norms and values. It can encourage a move away from the hyper-rational, productivity-focused mindset that dominates many spheres of life, towards a more holistic, balanced, and humane approach. Body Intelligence shifts us away from going through the motions in a fast paced, consumer centric culture and towards mastering the art of living.

Body Intelligence is not just a trendy concept—it's a vital tool for navigating the complexities of modern life.

For women, in particular, it offers a pathway to greater confidence, resilience, and self-awareness. By incorporating the GEPAP framework—Grounding, Expression, Presence, Attunement, and Pleasure—into your daily life, you can unlock the profound wisdom that your body holds.

You can choose to use your body as a fortress, protecting yourself from the possibility of pain or danger. Or as a cathedral, opening yourself to the beauty and wisdom of every cell.

In business, Body Intelligence can enhance your professional presence and effectiveness.

In marriage and motherhood, it can deepen your connections and foster healthier relationships. Spice up your sex life even. And in the broader social context, it can contribute to creating a more inclusive and compassionate world.

So, to you and all the other ambitious women out there -- it's time to embrace the power of Body Intelligence!

None of the traditional leadership methods and self improvement hacks get to the crux of power that you have. When you step into higher levels of fulfillment and personal power everybody wins— so what are you waiting for?

If you made it this far, you are probably done waiting. I'm willing to bet you are also open to learning how to cultivate Body Intelligence. And in that case, I’d love to have you in my Body Intelligence 101 Workshop.

You can click below to sign up. I hope to see you inside!

BODY INTELLIGENCE ACADEMY

WTF IS BODY INTELLIGENCE

“When you are disconnected from the body, you are disconnected from the most tangible reality of your being” -Philip Shepherd, Radical Wholeness.

Because society values power and progress, your body has taken the role of subordinate, working beneath your mind. You think of your cognitive function as the thing that moves you forward while your body is merely something to be pushed, pulled and molded to your liking.

Your body is simply the package. Continually trying to improve its appearance, working hard to make it attractive and desirable by any means necessary. (hello, $528.6 Billion dollar & $90 Billion dollar Beauty and Diet industries!)

You don’t often consider it, unless it screams at you in the form of pain, exhaustion, anxiety, injury or illness.

You’re taught to revel in the status of being the “go-to” person. The busy, reliable, loyal, steadfast, recognized, validated successful woman who does it all and looks good doing it. All the while secretly feeling burnt out, and often, sexually stagnant.

Burnt and dry – hardly a combo to aspire to, wouldn’t you agree?

And truthfully, the overwhelming amount of content swirling around the internet about embodiment, connecting to the Feminine, and best self care practices is superficial, impractical and non-inclusive. Here’s why 👇🏾

2️⃣ The wellness industry has an exploitative business model that focuses on novel products and guru-like leadership with no real attention to intrinsic nourishment. Many leaders in the space aim to make followers, clients and students beholden to them rather than truly empowering them.

“The modern individual is committed to being successful, not to being a person. He belongs rightly to the ‘action generation’ whose motto is to ‘do more but feel less” - Eric Fromm, Social Psychologist/Philosopher

The Biological Basis of Body Intelligence

It's commonly believed that you can change your behavior through reasoning or thinking. However, biologically, this is inaccurate.

Fifteen years ago, I realized that despite being a dancer my whole life, I had no idea how to do these things.

My Aha Moment

I was alone on stage with red lights illuminating my body and hundreds of eyes on me. I slowly walked around the pole, like a regal huntress selecting my prey. I went through the motions, moving in ways intended to look sexy to the audience but felt robotic and calculated to me.

As I took to the stage at the world’s biggest strip club in Las Vegas, it hit me -- I had absolutely no connection to how my body was moving.

Not only was my mind not present, but my body seemed to be angry at me. I remember being onstage and wanting to move differently but being afraid that veering from the formula would mess up my money.

Not even two full days after this moment of truth onstage at the club, I suffered public humiliation in my marriage when I found out my husband had been having an affair for quite some time, and I was the last to know.

I recognized certain behaviors as red flags at the time. I felt that things were not right but I simply didn’t trust my inner knowing enough to move on what I felt.

My life was a series of putting out fires, showing up to court dates, and trying my best to be an attentive mother. My confidence took a major hit as the life I thought I had crumbled in front of my face.

I knew I needed to regain my confidence and I desperately wanted to feel good. I needed an anchor. Something to keep me from losing myself completely. I had the strong feeling that if I continued down the path I was on, sooner or later I would no longer recognize myself.

Guided by that small voice, I put a playlist on shuffle and moved my body for almost an hour straight. I twerked, twirled, rolled on the floor, cried, did African dance, stretched, jumped and breathed deeply in silence.

That feeling of more that I craved, even before my world started to crumble, was right there.

I knew it would be a process to relearn how to trust my body and feel confident and powerful again, but I understood at that moment that I had just taken the first step.

So after all this talking, I’m sure you are thinking ‘Okay Lily, what does this look like practically, in my day to day life?’

Enter the GEPAP framework. (Pronounced geepap rhymes with CPAP, as in the sleep apnea machine) GEPAP is my framework to conceptualize Body Intelligence that will literally change your life. It has most certainly revolutionized mine.

The GEPAP Framework

To cultivate Body Intelligence, you can utilize the GEPAP framework, which stands for Grounding, Expression, Presence, Attunement, and Pleasure. Each component offers a pathway to deeper self-awareness and connection with your body that will upgrade the way you lead.

Grounding. This is the foundation of Body Intelligence. Centering practices such as meditation, breathwork, tapping and body scanning help you ground yourself and strengthen your present time awareness. These practices calm the mind, reduce stress and create a state of balance and clarity.

Presence. A huge part of Body Intelligence is cultivating your unique presence and learning how to amplify it. Whether you know it or not, you have a certain brand of charisma.

Attunement. Attunement is about being aware of and responding to another person’s emotional needs. The ability to get out of your head and tap in to another person’s emotional and energetic state through an open and relaxed nervous system.

Pleasure. Embracing pleasure is an often-overlooked aspect of Body Intelligence. This involves engaging in activities that bring joy and satisfaction, and savoring positive experiences.

So Can’t I Just Go To A Yoga Retreat?

Sure. I mean, who doesn’t love downward dog against an Instagram-able backdrop, prepared vegan meals and bonding with other women who are “doing the work”?

But here’s the thing….real transformation is the result of cumulative action. The wellness industry would like us to believe that we can and should remain on autopilot in the bulk of our daily lives, and in turn, sink money into the industry to “reconnect with ourselves”. Rinse and repeat.

The Broader Impact of Body Intelligence

Beyond personal well-being, Body Intelligence has the potential to create broader social change.

In a society where the dominant narratives are often shaped by a privileged minority, embracing Body Intelligence can help dismantle oppressive systems and foster a more inclusive and compassionate world.

Body Intelligence promotes a new kind of leadership— one that is empathetic, authentic, and grounded. Embodied leaders inspire commitment and hold space for the compassionate and creative humanity of their teams.

They recognize the value of diverse perspectives and create environments where everyone can thrive. There is more cooperation and less coercion.

Cultivating Body Intelligence, opens you to become more aware of the ways in which societal structures impact your life.

You can become aware of how your familiar patterns have been shaped by the various social identities you hold and focus on how you can foster a more inclusive culture both in and out of the workplace.

Body Intelligence is not just a trendy concept—it's a vital tool for navigating the complexities of modern life.

For women, in particular, it offers a pathway to greater confidence, resilience, and self-awareness. By incorporating the GEPAP framework—Grounding, Expression, Presence, Attunement, and Pleasure—into your daily life, you can unlock the profound wisdom that your body holds.

You can choose to use your body as a fortress, protecting yourself from the possibility of pain or danger. Or as a cathedral, opening yourself to the beauty and wisdom of every cell.

In business, Body Intelligence can enhance your professional presence and effectiveness.

In marriage and motherhood, it can deepen your connections and foster healthier relationships. Spice up your sex life even. And in the broader social context, it can contribute to creating a more inclusive and compassionate world.

So, to you and all the other ambitious women out there -- it's time to embrace the power of Body Intelligence!

None of the traditional leadership methods and self improvement hacks get to the crux of power that you have. When you step into higher levels of fulfillment and personal power everybody wins— so what are you waiting for?

If you made it this far, you are probably done waiting. I'm willing to bet you are also open to learning how to cultivate Body Intelligence. And in that case, I’d love to have you in my Body Intelligence 101 Workshop.

You can click below to sign up. I hope to see you inside!

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